Hallmark's Dysfunctional Section

Hallmark has added a new line of greeting cards. Here
are samples from their "Dysfunctional Section."

1. I always wanted to have someone to hold, someone
to love. And now that you've come into my life...
(Inside card) - I've changed my mind.

2. I must admit, you brought religion into my life...
(Inside card) - I never believed in Hell until I met you

3. As the days go by, I think how lucky I am....
(Inside card) - That you're not here to ruin it for me.

4. Congratulations on your promotion. Before you go....
(Inside card) - Will you take the knife from my back? You'll
probably need it again.

5. Someday I hope to marry...
(Inside card) - Someone other than you.

6. Happy Birthday! You look great for your age....
(Inside card) - Almost lifelike!

7. When we were together, you said you'd die for me...
(Inside card) - Now we've broken up, I think it's
time to keep your promise.

8. We've been friends for a very long time...
(Inside card) - What do you say we stop?

9. I'm so miserable without you...
(Inside card) - It's almost like you're still here.

10. Congratulations on your new bundle of joy...
(Inside card) - Did you ever find out who the
father was?

11. You are such a good friend. If we were on a
sinking ship and there was only one life jacket...
(Inside card) - I'd miss you terribly and think of you often.

12. Your friends and I wanted to do something
really special for your birthday...
(Inside card) - So we're having you put to sleep.

13. Looking back over the years we've been
together, I can't help but wonder...
(Inside card) - What was I thinking?

14. Congratulations on your wedding day!...
(Inside card) - Too bad no one likes your husband!

15. Each time we make love is like the first time...
(Inside card) - Coz none of them are worth remembering!

so....what number fits you? nyahahaha